Some of us are really unhappy and don’t need our faces shoved in the unhappiness of our life outside of work, while we are at work. Please keep your distance.

And for god’s sake, if we humor you with an answer, please don’t follow up with requests for more information.

I wish I had an office to disappear into with an actual ongoing work load that would save me from work-as-social-event.

Personally, as Chris G said, I AM only interested in item 1 . People don’t work together because they are all interested in each other’s personal lives. They work together because they have a job to do. It’s nice if people can be civil and not hostile. But benign indifference at work is OK too.

Chris G: Thanks for that, that is an important point. If you’re faking interest by rote, it’s better not to do it.

This only works when it comes from a real, genuine interest in other people.

Tez: Exactly! And the thing is that when you ask people about something they care about, what they end up telling you is often very interesting, because they have a passion for it. Be curious, indeed!

This irritates me beyond belief. So while I believe this is good advice, please don’t use it as a “Monday morning checklist item”. It does more harm than good if it’s preceived as insincere. I believe the follow-up questions and genuine interest are key. My experience is most managers care more about “item 1″ than they do about the employee’s weekend.

The one you mentioned is a simple yet effective way to do it.

Cheers,
Daniel