I’m at Reboot9 today - If you’re at Reboot too, please find me and say “Hi!” :o)

But do it today - I can’t be there tomorrow because I’m speaking on happiness at work in Stockholm.

And if you’d like to know more about happiness, please join my presentation at 15:00.

A while back I wrote about keeping salaries secret in the workplace and why I think it’s just a darned silly idea. It’s easily the most controversial post I’ve ever written, with 70% of the (many) commenters disagreeing vehemently. I posted a comment round-up as well.

Now Elana Centor revisits the issue in a post called The Last Frontier: Sharing Your Salary With Co-workers. She also finds that the idea of sharing salary information is not widely accepted.

Talk to most employee consultants and they say talking about salaries with co-workers is a bad idea.

My online search found just one consultant who agrees with me - Alexander Kjerulf who consults on how to be happy at work.

She cites some interesting articles. One horrible, horrible article on USAToday keeps telling us to never discuss our salaries - without ever once mentioning why. Except of course that it’s more convenient for the boss if you don’t.

It also blithely tells the story of an employee who was nearly fired for talking salary - even though US law explicitly says that “employers cannot interfere with, restrain or coerce employees in exercising their rights to discuss their wages, hours, and other terms and conditions of employment for their mutual aid or protection.”

More relevant is a CNN article that tells us to proceed with caution, but at least acknowledges that sharing salary information can be useful.

More tellingly, one commenter tells the story of finding a fax with all her co-workers salaries in it. The result: She is frustrated because she feels she is paid too little relative to her co-workers - but she can’t complain because she can’t admit to knowing their salaries.

I’m still convinced that keeping salaries secret is bad for both employees and businesses. It may seem easier and more convenient here and now, but the net result is an increased focus on compensation.

The question is of course how we break the taboo - it seems that in some workplaces talking about how much money you make is akin to discussing your sexual preferences. Any ideas?

I received a very interesting and erudite comment that addresses some of the fundamentals of happiness - both at work and in general.

The commenter also wildly disagrees with me on these fundamental issues - which only made me really happy. In my opinion, these are some of the most important and fundamental questions we can ask ourselves - and yet we only rarely have a chance to have this conversation. Thanks for that chance, Mr. Foozball!

Here’s the comment from Mr. Foozball:

I believe you are doing your readers a disservice here. You consistently refer to “happiness” and yet you do not define it? Your posts seem to repeat themselves with a similar message but offer no specific strategies, definitions, tactics and frameworks to assess what MORE you’ve accomplished as the result of this “happiness” vs. any alternative state. Also, how are we to distinguish between REALLY happy and mildly happy. Will occassionaly happy work? What if a HOME life makes one UNHAPPY and that bleeds subconcsiously into your job? Is it your WORK that is making you unhappy or is it your relationship to it? Is your definitions, self-esteem which is to blame? could it be that you lack a focused attention to WHO you are and WHAT you value in life? Perhaps it is not the Job, it is YOU which is the problem?

You appear to believe that happiness is the paramount objective of work. I disagree. Self mastery, mastery of complexity, insight into economics, recognition, esteem, collaboration and the ability to accomplish tasks that one could not accomplish alone and the ability to achieve a sense of self determination. These objectives are not easily attained and require significant focus, effort and stick-to-itness in the face of many set backs. Most audacious goals are enormously challenging and they often test our faith in ourselves. “Happiness” is not necessarily the goal, although a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction, pride and esteem often are. Happiness is surely an objective but happiness is akin to eating candy. Children can feel “happy” from a bowl of candy. But after too much of it and no protein, they will soon feel the effects and grow listless. Sometimes those nutrients the child needs for growth come in awful tasting vegetables. While they might not taste like candy - they are profoundly important to the child’s mental health. Does it make the child “happy” to eat them? No. Is it necessary for success? Certainly. The same can be said about exercise, waking up early, quiting smoking, enduring psycho-analysis, learning to apologize, etc. All these things require some sacrifice, challenge, pain, etc. None of them makes us “happy” immediately, but the outcomes of the process makes us healthier, wiser, successful, secure and ultimately more open to other’s similar struggles.

That should be the objective. Happiness as defined by a state of joyous contentment or religious rapture from the knowledge that all is one and that we are the source of the energy of the universe and that the Lord God is the King and that you share in His Glory — that could be Happiness to some. And that has NOTHING to do with money, work, candy, status, rank, gender, race, etc. It is simply the state of BEING.

Working is the necessary analogy to what we are all doing on the earth. Working toward some sense of betterment of ourselves thru some form of practice or mastery. In the cases where people feel trapped, usually it has to do with some lack of insight into alternatives, usually b/c they lack the imagination to envision an alternative and/or the commitment, faith and drive to focus and execute on their dream.

Happiness, in my opinion, is not the GOAL but rather the OUTCOME of the life well examined, well mastered and well disciplined. When we focus on our values, develop mastery over our desires, commit ourselves to a disciplined routine of self examination, education, collaboration and openness to input from our peers we can achieve our objectives. They can be ANYTHING grand or subtle. But nothing great is accomplished w/out some form of sacrifice, challenge, commitment, drive and endurance. Anything worth doing, worth struggling for, worth pursuing in life WILL require these elements. And like climbing Mt Everest, the Happiness comes as the result of ACHIEVING the REAL altitude vs. eating a bowl of candy to give yourself an artificial “high.”

As I see it, the main criticisms of Mr. Foozball are:

1. I offer no definition of happiness
2. I offer no tool to measure what happiness does for you
3. Happiness is NOT the purpose of work
4. Happiness can only come through sacrifice

Here’s what I think.

1: I offer no definition of happiness
That’s actually true. In my opinion there are three interesting questions about happiness at work:

1. What is it?
2. Why does it matter?
3. How do you do it?

I use this What-Why-How model all the time and there is no doubt that I spend almost no time answering the question “What is happiness at work?”

The thing is, there are many, many definitions of happiness at work. Some are biochemical, some are emotional, some are spiritual, etc…

But for all our problems defining it, we have absolutely no problems identifying when we’re happy at work and when we’re not. We know. My focus is on the practical side - on how you create a happy work situation for yourself or how you make an entire company happy.

I often say though, that it’s not just about happiness “here and now” - we’re talking long term happiness.

2: I offer no tool to measure what happiness does for you
That’s perfectly true - and that’s actually a great idea. I wonder what such a tool would look like.

Any ideas..?

3: Happiness is NOT the purpose of work
As I see it, work has no inherent purpose in itself - it has whatever purpose you give it.

You can work for the money, for the career opportunities, to make a difference, because people tell you you have to, for the sheer unadulterated fun of it or for a million other reasons.

For a long time, our thinking about work has been dominated by the protestant work ethic. This principle states (I paraphrase) that work is unpleasant and tough, and it’s supposed to be, because hard work purifies the soul and is good for you.

But today, more and more people realize that it needn’t be this way. Work can be fun in itself and they’re making happiness their purpose at work.

And I want to emphasize that there is absolutely no need to choose between being happy and doing great work.

Mr. Foozball mentions “Self mastery, mastery of complexity, insight into economics, recognition, esteem, collaboration and the ability to accomplish tasks that one could not accomplish alone and the ability to achieve a sense of self determination. These objectives are not easily attained and require significant focus, effort and stick-to-itness in the face of many set backs.”

In my opinion all of these are only enhanced when you like your job.

4: Happiness can only come through sacrifice
Mr Foozball’s viewpoint looks a lot like Stoicism, which holds that:

Self-control, fortitude and detachment from distracting emotions, sometimes interpreted as an indifference to pleasure or pain, allows one to become a clear thinker, level-headed and unbiased. A primary aspect of Stoicism would be described as improving the individual’s spiritual well-being.

In opposition to this, we have the Epicurean world view, in which attaining happiness is the ultimate goal of everything you do. This was originally defined by the Greek philosopher Epicurus.

I probably won’t shock anyone by saying that I’m with Epicurus on this one :o)

Sacrifice is one way to happiness. Sometimes. Most of the time you can be perfectly happy without sacrificing anything at all.

You mention exercise as an example - and I know that the traditional view is that if you want to exercise efficiently and stay in shape, you must force yourself to run (or swim or weight lift or cross country ski) regularly without fail, no matter how much you hate it.

Or, alternatively, you can find a form of exercise that is so much fun that you can’t possibly not do it. Considering how many sports exist, there has to be at least one out there that you like that much. Why jog 3 times a week if you really, really hate jogging, when you could swim instead and enjoy every second of it?

One very visible proof that the Epicurean approach works at work is Fred Gratzon. Fred is an American entrepreneur and multi-millionaire who calls himself the laziest man in North America and claims that he has never worked a single day in his life. In fact, he refuses to work. In his excellent book The Lazy Way to Success, he describes how this is not only possible, but in his opinion the only true way to success. Because, as he says:

If it feels like work, you’re not doing it right.

It’s important to note that when sacrifice is called for, when there is no easy, pleasurable way to your goal, you should definitely be willing to sacrifice. This is not about always staying inside your comfort zone and only doing what is nice and safe.

This way of living requires a lot of strength and self-knowledge. But in my opinion, it’s ultimately a lot more fruitful than the “life is hard, work is hard, everything great requires sacrifice” school of thought.

I believe that we lead better lives AND do better work when we follow the Epicurean thinking. It’s no panacea and it certainly carries its own inherent risks and flaws, but ultimately it has more potential to give you a fulfilling, interesting, happy life.

Stoicism has had its run, and I believe it has failed us - the promise of deferred pleasure having been broken over and over. Also, it’s been used to keep us down, to keep us in our place and to keep us subservient to religions and other organizations that told us they were the only possible path to happiness.

If the things you do won’t ultimately make you and those you care about happier, then why do them? Why not instead focus on doing those things that would bring you and others more long-term happiness?

So that’s my take: We’re here to be happy and make others happy. The Dalai Lama is with me on this one:

I believe that the very purpose of our life is to seek happiness. That is clear. Whether one believes in religion or not, whether one believes in this religion or that religion, we all are seeking something better in life. So I think the very motion of our life is towards happiness…

Where do you stand? Why do you work? How important is happiness to you - at work and in life? Write a comment, I’d really like to know!

Leandro from Brazil wrote in with a classic and crucial question: Do you need a college degree to be successful? Leandro is 21 and currently studies computer engineering and does NOT like it. His parents think he absolutely needs the degree - he doesn’t :o)

My take: No. You don’t need a college degree to be happy and successful.

I myself have a university degree (a masters in computer science) - but I chose my studies 100% based on my interests at the time. I was a major geek and my studies let me do some pretty cool stuff.

And while I would not have gotten my first “real” job without my degree, I would of course have gotten another job - even without the degree. And anyway, my first job sucked :o)

I believe success comes from doing something that:

1. You’re good at
2. You like doing
3. Someone is willing to pay you for

You need all three. Does this such an area currently exist for you? Be realistic!

If such an area does not currently exist, you can make one for yourself - and one way to do this is to study.

But considering how many possibilities are out there, I refuse to believe that this can only be achieved by suffering through 4-5 years of boring, unpleasant studying, just so you can wave a piece of paper around after you graduate.

Also, ask yourself this: If you truly do not enjoy your studies - how much can you possibly enjoy working in the same field later?

For a long time we’ve been telling people that “Sure, studying is not much fun, but you just have to get through 4-5 years of it and then everything is gravy.” First of all, this rarely turns out to be true, and secondly, this tends to make higher education an exercise in conformity - not learning. Those who complete their studies are not necessarily the best and the brightest, but those most willing to knuckle under and do as they’re told.

If I were in Leandro’s shoes, I would either:

1. Find a way to make my studies fun. Study with some fun people, go for some fun classes, work on my strategies and the way I spend time.
2. If that’s not possible, I’d witch to some kind of studies I really liked and found interesting or to a different school, where they didn’t make things as boring.
3. Or alternatively get a job or start my own company and do something really cool

What’s your take on this? Did you enjoy studying? How did you choose your studies? Are you happy and successful with or without a degree?

I’ve previously mentioned the reboot conference, how good it is and that you should definitely get yourself some tickets to reboot9, which is happening later this week right here in Copenhagen. If you didn’t listen and get yourself a ticket, it’s now too late - the event has sold out.

I’ll be speaking again this year on a theme that is tremendously important to me: Happiness. Not happiness at work, mind you, but happiness in general.

Specifically, I’ll be talking about the fact that:

1. Happiness is really, really important. And really, really easy.
2. We don’t seem to know much about what makes us happy. Or we don’t act much on that knowledge, anyway.
3. Happiness is subversive.

I’m on Thursday at 15:00-15:40. Read more about my presentation here.

Nicole Simon did a pre-reboot interview with me again this year - and we had another great, fun conversation. Visit her blog or click play below to hear the whole thing.

I’m giving a presentation about happiness at work in Stockholm on Friday June 1st at 9AM and I would LOVE to see you there!

I’m doing this in cooperation with 4good, who are representing me in Sweden. Here’s a snippet from their invitation:

Inhouse och 4good vill härmed bjuda in dig till ett exklusivt miniseminarie med Chief Happiness Officer Alexander Kjerulf, för första gången i Sverige!

Alexander är en av världens främsta inspiratörer på temat arbetsglädje och work-life balance, han är en nytänkande entreprenör och författare till boken �?Happy Hour is 9 to 5 – How to love your job, love your life and kick butt at work�?. Han driver också inspirationssiten och bloggen www.postivesharing.com med över 100.000 besökare varje månad.

Vi är glada över att ha Alexander Kjerulf här på ett unikt Sverigebesök! Kom och lyssna till hans mycket intressanta åsikter och insikter om varför arbetsglädje är så viktigt för att driva framgångsrika företag. Varmt välkommen till en av vårens absoluta höjdpunkter på 4good! (read more).

It will be held at the Scandic Continental on Klara Vattugränd 4. If you’re in Stockholm on Friday and would like to attend, send me an email, and I’ll make sure to put you on the guest list.

I just got an email from Brett Farmiloe, the founder of Pursue the Passion, who are up to something tremendously cool.

This Summer, Brett and two recent college grads are doing a “14,000 mile, 3 month journey around the US to interview 200 people about the passion that propels them in their profession”.

I really look forward to seeing what comes out of this! You can see their travel schedule, read the blog and if you know anyone who’s passionate about work (or if you yourself are) you should definitely tell Brett about it.

I value passion very highly at work myself. Here’s how it works for me:

1. I could never work on something I’m not passionate about. If a task or a project leaves me cold, no amount of money, coercion or feeling of duty can make me work on it.
2. What’s more, I don’t work well with people who are not passionate. If a person is not enthusiastic and passionate about a project, I find it hard to trust them, because I don’t know what makes them tick.
3. In my experience, passionate people get more work done. Waaaaaay more. It’s not even close.
4. Passionate people are much more fun to work with. Compared to people who treat work as “just a job”, passionate people are a blast!

What about you? Are you passionate about your work? Are the people you work with? Does passion matter to you? Write a comment, I’d really like to know :o)

A simple, sincere “Thank you” can go a long way at work. As this story beautifully illustrates, Thank you’s are part of the “oil”, the social lubricant, that makes for good relationships in the workplace.

Oil, salt, and vinegar
By Pilar Cambra
Chief columnist for Expansión newspaper.

Try this one day – any day, any normal, run-of-the-mill day: add up the time you spend complaining, grumbling, moaning – tacitly or explicitly – and the time you spend thanking and praising. Is there more vinegar than oil?…

It happened some time ago, but the incident – as tiny as a grain of mustard- has remained in my memory…

One day I was in a hurry (and late) for work, and parked my car lopsided in the company car park… “It doesn’t matter,�? I said to myself, “the bloke who uses the space next to me normally comes in on his motorbike!… So there’s plenty of room for him to park…�?. And off I went, thinking no more of it…

But it turns out that the colleague who parks next to me sometimes comes by motorbike, but others he comes by car. And on that particular day he had to choose his car: quite a large vehicle which, obviously, came nowhere near fitting into the small space I’d left for his motorbike…

After a while, by which time I was engrossed in more pressing matters, I got a call from the car park attendant: “Mrs. Cambra?: Would you mind parking your car properly?… The user of the place next to you says he just can’t get his into the space you’ve left…�?.

I’ll confess: the sharp vinegar of bad temper surged up inside me… “I’m on my way!�? I told the attendant. And so I went down to the car park, huffing and puffing, of course, cursing the hassle, the interruption, and the bloody idea of my colleague to bring his bloody car instead of his bloody motorbike…

Anyway: I moved my car into the exact space which it should take up and went back up to the office breathing fire, like St.George’s dragon… A few minutes later, I got another call: “Pilar? it’s your car park neighbour… I’m just calling to apologise for having to bother you and, of course, to thank you for moving your car so quickly… Thank you!�?…

I was so taken aback that I could barely speak… In the end, in the midst of a black sea of shame for my awful behaviour, my terrible thoughts and nasty complaining, I replied: “No, thank YOU – you’re a good person, there aren’t many left these days! I’m sorry and I promise you’ll never have any problems parking your car again�?.

Do you know what?: thanking someone seems to have fallen out of common use, become old-fashioned, out of step with our straight-talking and somewhat brusque times… In fact, it almost sounds naff… “Thank you�?, we say; and right away, we shudder at the prospect of hearing the slimy voice, 1950’s radio presenter style, coming back at you with “no, madam…thank yoooouuuuu�?… How jaw-clenchingly awful!…

In the work environment the idea of “not owing anyone anything�? is held up and honoured: the more independent we are, the more manly (or womanly) we feel… Thanking people for favours, small or large; for support, minimal or huge; for services, inconsequential or decisive; is a bit humiliating: as if turning to others when we need them weakens us, undermines our reputation as a super-exec-who-goes-it-alone…

The oil of gratitude, gratitude which makes the cogs turn without squeaking, sliding smoothly and politely, falls far below the sharp vinegar of our complaining, protests, reproaches…

As if vinegar makes us stronger, less vulnerable, more invincible… And I’m not saying that complaining, if it is fair and necessary, is not a fundamental part of keeping justice in the workplace… But, just like in a salad dressing, a few drops may be enough. Mainly so we don’t drown out the salt, of our cordial lives, of working with a smile on our faces.

Thank you to Jaizki Arteagabeitia Perea for finding this article in Spanish, for telling me about it and for arranging to have it translated into English. And of course thanks to Pilar for giving her permission to reproduce it here!

The article was translated by the nice people at contentspanish.com. Thanks!!

Related:

• Four fantastic phrases at work (includes “thank you!”)
• How to complain constructively
• Pilar Cambra’s blog
• The original version of the article in Spanish : Aceite, vinagre y sal.
• More articles by Pilar Cambra (also in Spanish).

Your mission this Monday is to have some fun at work. Even Tom Peters thinks this is an absolute necessity:

Don’t do it [work] unless it’s fun.
Make it fun. (Always possible, per me.)
Make it fun for others. (Which makes it fun/more fun for you.)
- Tom Peters (source)

How do you make work fun? Here are a few ideas you can try out this Monday.

Amber recommends Silly Putty.

I bought a pound of Silly Putty in bulk and gave a chunk to each of my team. It is amazing the pen holders, stress relievers, sculptures, etc. that have evolved. Well worth the $15!

Shel recommends candy and workplace toys:

I put a bowl of peppermint lifesavers (you can buy them in bags, individually wrapped for hygene) on my desk. Lots of people stop by and grab one - which has lead to some great conversations - work and other wise. I also have a Rubic’s Cube, a Magic 8 Ball, and this bizarre plastic ball made up of geometric parts that cause it to flip inside out (changing its colour) when tossed in the air, a mini Zen garden, and other items to busy one’s hands while talking - or just hanging out. It’s a great way to create a relaxing atmosphere!

I’ve always been partial to foosball myself, but maybe that’s too Silicon Valley, dot-com-boom for your workplace.

If you need inspiration, there are plenty more toys here…

How do you create some fun at work? Write a comment, I’d really like to know!

The Chief Happiness Officer’s Monday tips are simple, easy, fun things you can do to make yourself and others happy at work and get the work-week off to a great start. Something everyone can do in five minutes, tops. When you try it, write a comment here to tell me how it went.

Previous monday tips.

Today I gave a keynote presentation at the web.start conference here in Zagreb, Croatia on happiness in startups.

My 3 main points in the presentation were:

1. Happiness at work will make or break your startup. Creating a great company where people like love working is the #1 success factor.
2. It’s easy. All it takes to make people happy at work is results and relationships. Give them a chance to do work they can be proud of, together with people they like, and they will be happy.
3. Do something. We can all be a part of creating happiness where we are.

So how do you do it? My 8 tips for creating a happy startup are:
1: Skip the boring crap
Why are you slaving over bills and invoices if you really, really hate doing that? Do what you like to do - outsource everything else, preferably to someone who likes it. Yes, there are in fact people out there who enjoy bookkeeping.

2: Screw the business plan
You may be forced to make one to satisfy investors or your bank - but then promptly forget all about it. The world changes too fast for a business plan to be a relevant tool, and trying to run your company according to the plan is an exercise in futility.

3: Dump customers that make you unhappy
As a small company, it’s tempting to hold on to every customer. Don’t. If a customer repeatedly causes trouble and is abrasive, fire their ass. Here’s an example of why that’s such a good idea.

4: Relax & take breaks
Breaks, vacations and pauses are essential to your happiness at work. Not so much for the chance to recuperate, but mostly for the perspective they give you. You need to get away once in a while to see the whole and remind yourself of what you’re doing, rather than being stuck in short-term problem-solving mode.

5: Hire happy people
And the codicil: Hire no assholes. Naturally happy people are a boon to a startup, because they are more energetic, motivated, passionate and creative.

6: Make all decisions based on this: What will make me, my people and my customers happy?
Forget any of these, and you’re probably going in the wrong direction.

7: Celebrate your victories
Every chance you get! That is what give you the energy to get your next victory - and to overcome your next defeat.

8: ask yourself why?
Why are you starting this company? If your reasons are not about making yourself and/or others happy - try again. Why do anything if it won’t make you happy?

Not only do happy companies make more money, but when you’re creating a business, why create one, that won’t make you happy?

And never forget: Happy companies make more money: