Imagine it’s your first day in a new job. You sit down at your desk for the first time, and waiting for you there is a note from your new boss.
In the note your boss bids you a warm welcome to the company, and then says this:
1: My most important priority is your happiness and productivity at work. If there’s anything I can do to make you happier and more efficient – tell me right away. This isn’t idealism, it’s good business, because happy people are more productive.
2: I will not burden you with endless rules and regulations. You’re an adult – I trust you to use your best judgment.
3: You have my full permission to screw up, as long as you own up to it, apologize to those affected and learn from it.
4: Please tell me when I screw up so I can apologize and learn from it.
5: Please make sure to hunt down people who do great work and praise them for it. I will do this as much as humanly possible, but I can’t do it alone.
6: If I get it right occasionally, I’d love to hear about it from you, too :o)
7: I will always have time for you. My calendar will never be so full that my next free time to talk to you is three weeks from next Friday.
8: I want to know about you as an employee AND as a human being. I DO care about your private life, about your and your family’s health and well-being.
9: Life is more than work. If you’re regularly working overtime, you’re just making yourself less happy and more stressed. Don’t join the cult of overwork – it’s bad for you and the company.
10: I expect you to take responsibility for your own well-being at work. If you can do something today to make yourself, a co-worker or me a little happier at work – do it!
This post was inspired by Michael Wade’s post over at ExecuPundit called Note from boss to employees. I liked his tips but I found the tone of them a little defensive. Michael’s tips had an undercurrent of “business is hard and being a leader is tough but we can slog it out together.”
I disagree – work is great fun (or at least it could and should be).
How would you like a note like this from your new boss?
77 thoughts on “A note from the boss”
I think that your number 9 is a little bit off, especially since “work is great fun (or at least it could and should be).”
I work 40 to 60 hours in a normal week. I love every minute of it. My coworkers (more or less “employees”) work less than that and it’s OK.
I think #9 could take a more evenhanded approach to the topic:
“Life is more than work. It’s important to maintain a work-life balance that works for you. Don
great post – thank you :)
Yeah I so agree with you, only the privat life is a bit direct. I think you should know a persone before saying that, it could sound a bit creepy.
Alexander, that is a brilliant list for orientation. I read it through several times, then printed it for a group here in the office. That is excellent. Cheers on the great thinking..happy employees start out that way from the first day!
this is so unrealistic in todays modern work place, where they do things like fire people for taking time off when their mom dies…
it is almost an insult to working people in america…
or maybe this is a note from a boss in north korea? shown only to tourists?
@tim it is not about how they do it it is about how you do it.
I hate to say it, but a note like that from my new boss would bother me quite a bit. It’s clearly written by someone with very little management experience– either that or so much that they know exactly what to put in a note like that which will convince those of moderate to low intelligence that they really do care.
I’m going to let you in on something, from the world of business psychology:
The best way to get an employee to work happily for *cheap* is to convince them that you understand their needs personally, and that you care about them personally. Elements from this note have been used since time began in order to squeeze just that much more effort out of workers who, if their brains were functional under all the praise at that moment, would have every right to beat their boss senseless with their computer keyboards and walk out.
Example from the above letter:
“Life is more than work. If you
This is a refreshing and positive approach! I would love a note as such.
It seems to me that what you write builds on the assumption that whoever says or writes this as boss, actually doesn’t mean it; i.e. it’s just a spin. If you – as a boss – truly don’t believe in this and the management philosophy behind it, don’t write it. Don’t say it. Don’t even get close to it. I think the worst thing any manager can do, is not to be straightforward and honest about his or her style – in essence: NEVER use spin! It doesn’t matter which management style you have, stay the h… away from spin. (unless your management style is based on spin, of course…but then that’s a whole other story and then I think you’re totally on the wrong track ;-)).
Great post Alexander – I also like Greggles twist to #9.
As a virtual assistant and independent contractor to other businesses, I can say that this is an excellent way to begin a healthy and productive work relationship. The business philosophy is not out-of-balance in the industry that I know — it’s important to find balance between work, family, and clients. I have read similiar sentiments in Multi-VA handbooks and know for a fact that these businesses are thriving.
I used similar statements when I was a manager in the corporate world setting, had a very low employee turnover, and we exceeded our sales goals month after month. Our Team knew what was expected and collectively we worked together like a well-oiled, precision piece.
It’s sad that others can see the benefits stated in these 10 statements. I hope each would be open to give it a try. From someone who’s witnessed the benefits of working in this fashion.
Let me put it this way: If you have a bunch of workers in the USA in today’s economy and you’re taking the possibility of overtime pay away from them to be replaced by “kind words”, you’re doing them precisely the opposite of a favor and you’re way, way out of touch.
The time for this letter was in about 1997, when people were zipping through loft-offices on electric scooters and funding massage therapists for programmers.
@caradog There is a big difference between wanting your salaried workers to not spend 80 hours a week on a project, and removing an overtime option from hourly workers. I think the letter is more aimed at the salaried overworking variety.
Good managers do exist in the world, that aren’t lying and taking things away from you. I think you’re reading a lot of experience into this letter that isn’t there, which is indicative of probably most workplaces unfortunately.
Number 10 sounds a bit ambiguous and could be interpreted as being too defensive. It may be a good idea to clarify that a bit.
Number 9 is similar to something by boss told me before I took the position I’m in (which I’m very happy with, by the way). Basically, he said that he doesn’t want people to have to put in regular overtime–if it’s normal that we have to work more than 40 hours a week, then that means there’s something wrong with labor allocation and we need to fix that.
My supervisor was very sincere when he said that, and it’s one of the things that convinced me (rightly) that I would enjoy working here. Additionally, since my company doesn’t pay for overtime (something I agree with given our office culture, incidentally), there’s no financial incentive for discouraging working extra hours. So, there’s no spin. KF
Actually, I would think my new manager is trying to hard too be liked and thinks too much about sounding like he cares and/or has read to many ‘how to be a good manager’ books. In other words: it sounds fake to me.
This kind of behavior reminds me of when you’re the new kid in the class and you want everybody to like you. People around you know they have to wait a while to see what you’re really like.
Cynical? Maybe. Realistic? Probably.
Do you mind if I use this as a model for all new hires in the future? It’s the embodiment of everything a good manager should do in bringing a new person onto a team.
Great post as always.
If I received a letter like this from my boss I would read: “I’m using all the strategies I learned from that “inspiring bosses who care” course I took and I’m stupid enough to expose them in a letter instead of actually putting them to use”.
Thanks for all the great comments people.
I find it fascinating (and a little bit sad) that a common reaction to something like this is to see it as an attempt at manipulation, rather than a sincere wish for a better way to work than “me boss, you employee.”
Never forget, there are many great leaders out there, who believe and practice the things written in this note and there are many great workplaces out there, where people have fun, enjoy each other’s company and do great work.
I sure would love a leader like that. He shows strong beliefs in his/her employees and he deserves that his employees believe him until proven wrong. It is like leader and employees must deserve each other – build a mutual trust.
I understand that employees that have experienced managers who are more words than action are suspicious, but leaders like the one in Alexanders blog is out there. When I did my NLP Master modelling project a year ago, I modelled 3 danish leaders who acted according especially to the point discussed mostly above: Working overtime is bad. And they really achieved remarkable results !
Unfortunately only danish reading readers can enjoy their really strong beliefs in the project which is available at http://posility.dk/referencer/publikationer.html. Enjoy reading those who can :-)
I must say. I have worked in a couple of high powered jobs, now am working at a job that is fun and we are productive. Extremely so. In my past jobs I think I would have really loved this whole concept. I am HR by trade and I truly think something along these lines would make a whole world of difference in some peoples attitudes!
Just a random question. To the people who dislike the message, and suspect that there’s manipulation and/or a bad attempt at enacting misunderstood management courses…
…have any of you ever had the incidents you’re worried about happen? Have you seen someone who’s gone to the effort to make these rules put them out and then mislead their employees? Have you had someone who’s sent this letter out without being able to follow up on it (especially the bits about being available and owning up to mistakes)?
I have worked at an environment where the corporation said one thing (we care, we listen, etc), but the management said something else entirely. I’ve never seen a manager to go this effort and not mean it. Have you?
I would like to know two things:
1. Where does this boss work?
2. Are they hiring?
I think I would fall right out of my chair if a boss gave me a note like this on my first day. While it’s unlikely to happen, I wish all of us could work at a company that believes and shows they appreciate employees like the boss writing this letter does.
Yes, absolutely I’ve seen this strategy used against people in the workplace. I’ve had multiple managers state “Feel free to share anything that’s on your mind with me…” And I gotta say, those people who were stupid enough to voice complaints soon found themselves out the door.
People who are conscious of this find themselves competing in today’s difficult job market for higher salaries and better positions. Manipulators are rewarded and promoted into positions of authority. To pretend that this doesn’t happen is just plain naive.
I’m not saying that I dislike the message. In fact the world would be a better place if managers were this open. But then the world would also be a better place if we didn’t eat cute little baby lambs or hack elephants’ faces to bits for a few kilos of ivory.
@asdf Well a better world starts by yourself.
asdf: I agree – it’s naive to pretend that bad workplaces and manipulative bosses don’t exist. And to pretend that good workplaces and good bosses don’t exist is cynical.
Judging from some of the negative responses, I would say that too many people have got hung up on the specifics rather than the principles. If every boss wrote a letter like that to his/her employees the impact would soon be lost. The fundamental point here is that need to follow the Golden Rule and “do to others what you would have them do to you.”
Way back (more years ago than I woulkd like to admit to!) I took over a department where resntment and distrust were rampant. I took over from a man who was loved by his staff but who had had no backbone and as a result things had become a mess and nothing was working properly. As a result he had been fired and I was required to turn things around. Clearly a challenge.
I didn’t send any of my peple a letter, but called a meeting and told them that I understood how they felt about their former boss, but as a newcomer I had obviously not been involved and that it was now simply historic fact and that we had to just get on and work together as best we could. I said that I couldn’t MAKE them like me, but I hoped we could work well together and to that end it was important that we all understood one another. I then used an acronym of I EXPECT to identify what I wanted from them and I PROMISE to identify what they could expect from me. I cannot for the life of me remember now what the letetrs stood for but it worked.
Needless to say, it was thoroughly tested right from the start, but as people saw that these standards were expected to be adhered to by both parties so things got better. In fact it was quite a remarkable turnaround. I was, however, put to the ultimate test in keeping my side of the deal which ended up in my having to resign when senior management insisted I fire one of my staff when I didn’t feel it was ajustified decision. Interestingly, the entire staff apparently followed suit immediately after I left!
So the principles do work!!
I love this note. I don’t see it as a note from my new manager (as in direct supervisor) because I would see him on a daily basis and probably the moment I set foot in the office, so there wouldn’t be a need for him to leave me a note.
I’m imagining this as a note from the CEO, the big boss! How cool would that be! I would doubt number 7 a bit, but hey, nobody is perfect! It’s the intention that counts and a note like this sends out such a positive message and is such a nice welcome! (As opposed to not even having a desk or a network login on your first day, as if nobody had expected you…)
I can see a variation of this as a nice personal first chat between a new employee and his direct manager, though. Just to set the scene and let the employee know how appreciated he is and that he’s invited to trust the manager and v.v. Of course this needs to be followed up by actions, but it will be much easier, after such a note.
I am coaching (new) managers in “making their employees happy” and keeping them in the company, so things like this are right up my alley! I think I will use this in one way or the other :)
I’m very sad for the people who’ve been treated badly for so long that they read only negative stuff into this.
I’ve also checked the “original” on execupundit, oh and it’s soo bad!!! It’s a “me, me, me!” version, while this is a “you, you and all your colleagues” approach (which works much better because in the end of course you (the boss, the company) benefit from it. The advantage, though, is that everyone’s happy – long lasting; vs. only “you” being happy – short lived.)
@asdf and @Caradog LLewellyn,
Yes, there are hypocritical and manipulative bosses out there. And they do often get promoted. And they create untold stress and distress in the work environment. And yes, I have worked for them and with them. (Thankfully not at the moment).
Tragically a lot of these people are less Machiavellian than simply self-deluded. They TRULY BELIEVE that they are helping their people.
Nevertheless, there are many good managers.
My wish for everyone who has been burned in the past is to be able to spend some time working with the type of leader described in this post. It can be a truly transformative experience. Once you’ve seen a great working environment created by this type of person, you’ll be less likely to feel as cynical. At least, this is what helps me.
Nice note.. I wouldn’t mind receiving it at all.
Good point, Alec.
I disagree with you on the intentions of others, however. From my POV, most people fight to climb the ladder of success. Maybe they have children to feed or maybe they want a bigger house. I think for most, ‘helping others’ falls way below ‘getting ahead.’ And unfortunately stepping on people is often the outcome.
We see this at major corporations all the time… jobs are slashed at the same time execs reward themselves with huge bonuses. The more profitable the corporation, the bigger the pay-out. This is why, in my opinion, master manipulators are frequently CXO’s at Fortune 500 orgs.
People who I truly admire… the Ghandi’s and Mother Theresa’s of the world, can certainly make a difference. But these personality types are very, very rare and they often avoid the corporate ladder altogether.
even if the letter is sincere it’s just to cheesy!
Even after reading how every ‘disagree’ post seems to get jumped on by other users in this forum (everyone is entitled to their opinion), i have to add to the disagree. If the intentions behind this note are true, then it wouldn’t be left to a form letter to assure the employees. It would be expressed through actions- spending time with your staff, taking a non-patronising interest in their lives (“I’m only listening to you because the HR course told me to”). And yes, I currently have a boss who does this. Writes the cheesy notes, avoids hanging out with staff socially even when invited, tells you to express any issues- but then jumps on any opinion out of line with his own. All it has done is create more of an ‘us and them’ mentality, and widened the gap of communication.
I’m all for positive, open communication in the workplace- but back it up with actions, and don’t leave it to a ‘one size fits all’ letter.
Great Post! I work for the Friendship Stone, it is a small company (that is going to be huge) run by a small group of women. The company is internet based. We are two women in Israel, one in the Boston Area and one in New York! I am the web producer. I am on line basically 24/7! Recently in our office we have been having major problems with our internet connection. and being that I am the one who manages the site, we decided that it would be better for me to work from home. Great I love it! But after a week – my boss the owner of the company said”do you miss working in the office?” I said yes and no! I get much more work done at home – no interuptions – no calls – just work work work! But what I do miss is the fabulous Coffee from the esspresso machine in the mornings!” We both laughed. An hour later my mobile phone rang “Shari come outside I am in your driveway” I went out side and their she was with a cup of Joe! These little things – even a cup of coffee make working with her amazing! She is the
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Yes, unfortunately #9 is a sticking point for me too. @ Caradog – it’s not even so much that companies nowadays can’t afford to pay anybody overtime so they don’t want anyone doing it. They actually just put all the employees on salary and make them work overtime anyway for nothing extra. It’s a trend made worse by an economy in which employees are scared to jump ship in protest.
Fantastic! Thanks for the list!
It’s hard to be happy knowing that most of your work is pointless BS that just makes some selfish bastard rich and destroys the ecosystem to boot.
If you’re happy with your job, it’s because you either couldn’t care less about what you’re really doing or you don’t have a real job.
Think about it, nobody is going to pay you to save the world.
I’ve been reading this blog for about 2 years, mostly via RSS. I occasionally commented, but this was the first post where I left a comment in a long time…what a change!
I just can’t believe the stuff that I’ve been reading in the comments. For all the negative people who are complaining about how insincere this letter is, how manipulative it is, etc. How did you end up reading this post in the first place? You seem like the last people in the world I would expect to read a site like this. I can only imagine that you are trolls  and want to get a rise out of the rest of the commenters….
@Don or you start for yourself.
This list describes exactly where I work. One of the biggest banks on my country (and English country, by the way). I have no idea if is possible to have this type on USA but, outside USA, you can have it. Just as a note, I have a very good salary, a fantastic working environment, a company who really cares about my well-being, who pays overtime, many parties, juice, beer or wine on Fridays, events are organized to happen inside business hours, flexible working time. I’m really happy where I’m right now — and they are always asking if I’m happy and what they can do to keep me happy all the time :)
It’s called the market. It’s called oligopoly. The only companies that can afford to behave this way are the ones that are making (stealing) so much money that a dozen other companies cannot. And that’s only in the short term.
This institutional Horatio Alger thinking is disgusting. A company, just like a person is subject to market pressures larger than it.
This type of crap exists to make bankers forget that they profit from extortion. You pick a business, every last one is an exploiter of something, from the red cross to green peace.
The behavior of any supervisor is a direct result of market pressures. If a supervisor can afford to be this nice its because 4 others can’t afford it. This is much like the phenomenon of the rich speaking about money being unimportant.
It’s not about how nice a guy he is or this mythical land of sharing and group effort. It’s about an aristocracy and a hierarchy. And in the end the most thieving cutthroat bastard will win. After all, can this supervisor give everyone in the world a job?
Nice guys finish last for a reason and that’s a systemic problem. Pretending you can even begin to cure it with cute little motivational lists is about as absurd as thinking a little shut-eye will cure cancer.
are you against this list in particular (I agree that some points might be over the top or idealistic, but I still like it and see the whole list more as a metaphor) or against kind bosses in general?
I do believe that the success of a company depends to a large part on the happiness of its employees. I believe the more they care about their employees, the more loyal the employees become to the company and the more effort they make. Which is turn makes the company more successful. Therefore I believe that companies who “can afford this”, can afford it because they’ve been doing it all along, which made them what they are now.
What do you think of the statement “An organization can only become the best version of itself, if the people who drive it become the best version of themselves.”?
Which approach to motivate employess would you take, instead of something like this list?
Let me guess… none of you have ever been in management? Because let me tell you, the instant you stop using boot-in-your-ass policies, everyone working for you stops doing anything besides what they feel like doing. I went in with the mentality of being the “cool” boss, with employees I knew personally, and in a matter of hours they were smoking a joint out back. Bosses are pricks because quite honestly, many employees do nothing more than what they have to to avoid being fired.
Alex, this is most excellent! You’ve stirred up a great topic and discussion. I agree with yo that I’m shocked at some of the negative and cynical reactions, but I’m not surprised. I’ve given that message not as a note, but in person and I know other managers in my company have as well, which is why its a great place to work! It’s too bad that is such a rare thing for people to experience that they would think it to be fake. Faking it is not good, that is for sure. But it does genuinely exist in the workplace and it is powerful.
Once again, great advice for a happy more productive workplace!
This is SO like the company where I work!
(This is, if you take this list, and do the total 180-degree diametrically OPPOSITE!) :-(
Hi Dwindle, I have been a manager for a long time and I tried my best to be a manager who would write a note like this. I have grown many people of my team into managers and my team had the lowest turnover in staff in the company. Everyone is different. Maybe there are people who you can motivate by “boot-in-the-ass-policies” but I haven’t met any yet. I just made sure never to forget what it was like when I was an employee on the low end of the food chain and tried to to things that I would have liked back then.
I had somone in my team who played solitaire all day long, who had a beer for lunch and maybe even a joint! I did not care! All I care about is that he is productive, gets the job done and contributes to the team. If no harm is done and he can be alert and productive after a joint, honestly I don’t care (but then, I live in the Netherlands… :))
His job was running all kinds of reports – a boring job to anyone else, but a very important one. So while he was waiting for the reports to finish, he played solitaire, if he had nothing else to do. He was the most helpful and knowledgeable person, who everyone came to advise for, he was the one who could come up with the best solutions for everyone, because he had the time to contemplate them. He would always help out and stay longer if needed. All because I cut him some slack and let him have his freedom to play computer games. Of course, we turned his screen in a way so it wasn’t too obvious for everyone, because of course there’s a chance for other (busy) people to get demotivated when they see him play. Over time, though, everyone knew and they didn’t care because he was always there for them when they needed him, they realized his job was different from anyone else’s, plus, they themselves were different and were motivated by different things.
If you gain their respect by showing interest in them and figuring out what drives them (each) and then give that to them whenever possible, you can’t do much wrong.
I am also amazed at the disbelief in so many of the comments.I feel why shouldn’t a boss say that? And if it’s what you would like (in a genuine manner), it can be found.
firstly, this kind of note on my first day in any of the 5 top engineering firms in the world in the last ten years never happened…and hope it never does.
Whenever, my boss or collegues question me on a personal standpoint, i get itches…and if my personal well-being REALLY concerns them…business and emotions do not blend people. Capitalism isn’t “a beautiful day in Mr.Rogers neibourghood”
If i would get a note like that i would definetly quit the job or political position right away, due to the immense lack of professionalism and show of incompetency of the HR departments to take away the pink glasses they have on the face…
Go take that note to Wall street or Bay Street (in Toronto) see how friendly your well-being is important to them…(strangers…!!)
Good luck in the pursuit of wealth and happiness, (such is the goal of linear capitalism..period.)
It’s interesting… and I think this post goes to a larger issue. What makes an effective manager? The moderator argues ‘understanding’ and ‘compassion.’
I agree that these can be invaluable qualities… to a point. When compassion gets in the way of good business sense, the dept/org is doomed to failure.
When someone screws up, that person needs to be held accountable. And in a bad economy, a ‘good’ manager needs to be able to make tough decisions, without being blinded by rose colored glasses.
Personally I feel that it is more realistic to acknowledge that people do make mistakes. If you aren’t doing any work, you can’t make a mistake, if you don’t make any mistakes, you don’t learn much!
Its much more of a problem where people are scared to own up to making mistakes or just hide them anyway.. That’s more common. Then no one can ever put it right.
I am pleased that I work at a company where #2 is made clear with every weekly team-talk.
This is a great idea.
Just the thought of writing such a letter to welcome a new employee.
I suppose this could be extrapolated to a new neighbour, a new member of an organisation etc.
I work for a company that espouses all of these ideals. I didn’t get them in a note, per se, but it has been reinforced in word and deed for as long as I’ve worked there, often using the same phrasing. Most of our employees give 110% in return, and only two people have left since I started there three years ago–both of them for reasons that had nothing to do with the company. I don’t know if this works for all companies, but it is amazing what it has done in ours.
I wish my boss cared enough about his team – then I probably wouldn’t hate my job (or him) so much :o)
I’m a little bit thrown by all the comments on this. Surely the point isn’t to actually send this note? It’s just a device to explain how great it would be if an employee starting a new job felt confident that their boss made all of these commitments to them. One of my favourites is no. 3 – you’re allowed to screw up, you’re only human.
An employee who is allowed to mess up occasionally as long as they learn from it, is far more likely to be themselves and perform to the best of their ability from day one.
Great post Alex.
Wow, Alex really hit the mark with this post *must remember to High Five him tomorrow*
I find it very interesting to observe how the comments to a large extent are organized into two opposite goups. The happy, trustworthy and positive (you know you are:) and the pessimistic, fearful and mistrusting. In the end, it akmost comes down to faith.
And then not quite so. We see again and again (with clients and in studies) that happy companies do better, have more succes, are more creative, have lower employee turnover… and make more money. All that aside, I personally have resigned from several jobs due to a negative, mistrusting and unsensitive boss. I would have gladly stayed had the boss shown more trust, caring and a genuine interest in the wellfare of the people employed.
But then again, then I would’nt have this great job where I get to make people happy at work :o)
Number 8 is not really ideal for me … I dont’ want my boss to know about me .. to know privat staff … Let’s put it this way – I dont’ want my friend to pay my wage .. ifi he/she is my friend – then I want to be equal, to be in prtnership – meaning to share added value that mine and his work has produced … But if he is my boss, all I would want is that he has an anderstanding of my need to have life outside work and that working is ap part of a much bigger picture …
Would this list work is we were to include this new assumption for the number 8?
A note from the boss! Ha! Last role I turned up to (I am a contracting software developer) there was not even a desk for me, let alone a note from the boss on it.
That would be the cutest boss ever :3
my boss is just like this!!! i work in hr though, so i guess she sorta should be. i feel so sorry for folks who hate their jobs because of the social microcosm. my coworkers are thoughtful and honest. the exec director gives everyone (140 employees) anniversary and birthday cards with $5. we have picnics. we have breakfast every two weeks. we address the employee satisfaction surveys down to the last minute detail. we have “pat on the back” awards.
i love my job.
Sadly, if I ever got a note like that from my boss I’d quit my job then and there. Not because I don’t like the contents of the note, mind, but rather because I wouldn’t believe it and couldn’t trust my boss to live by it.
I would love to receive a note like that from a new boss; it would mean I got off to the best possible start there. However, if the boss then turned out to be not following the steps in the note, I would become unhappy very quickly…it would be worse to say all that and then not follow it up, than to just not say it at all
This is complete bullshit. No boss I’ve ever had gave a shit about anything other than the bottom line. The ‘new employee’ is nothing more than an inexperienced resource drain.
I just loved this post! and would want this right away adopted at my work place.
Great note. I wish more companies would make it their policy.
I have NEVER had a boss like this and I am highly skeptical there are many like this. My guess is this was written by some supervisor who is a dick to his/her employees, and is capable of the necessary mental gymnastics required to delude his/herself into believing they actually treat their employees that way.
Given my 30+ years experience with “my door is open anytime, I’d like to be your friend” bosses, I’d know it was a trap. “Give me a stick to beat you with” is what that entire list translates to in the real world.
“You’re here to work, not be mollycoddled. And I don’t want to get close to you any more than you want to get close to me.” In this day when an “offensive” entry on Facebook can get you fired, you really expect openness and trust between employer and employee? Dream on.