Tuesday I was doing a presentation for one of my clients, an insurance company outside of Copenhagen.

As the participants arrived, I noticed that one lady was carrying a bouquet of flowers – so of course I had to ask what that was about. Was it her birthday, or..?

Turns out the flowers were from a coworker, who had just given them to her along with a hand-written card that said:

Not everything that counts can be counted
Not everything that can be counted, counts

To the best co-worker in the world!

Hugs,
Tinna

Needless to say, she was VERY happy about this kind of recognition from a coworker.

And this is a fine example of how we can make others happy at work through recognition, building good relationships, random acts of workplace kindness and just plain taking the time to appreciate the nice people around you.

That is happiness at work, right there.

I wrote a guest post for Steven Aitchison’s excellent blog on How to change your thinking about happiness at work.

Steve suggested the topic and it’s a good one. Becoming happy at work is very much about changing the way you think – as you can also see in this story.

This is the kind of email I reeeeeeeally like getting:

First of all: Thank you so much for all of your intelligent and inspiring advice about work.
I was working at a retail job and not loving it. In fact, I will admit, I hated for a while and I was the “complainer” that you have written about.

I read your articles about having a good attitude at work and about being a constructive complainer instead of just a big pain.

I realized that I needed to look at the positives about my work and quit kvetching. I liked my co-workers and most of the time the job was pleasant. It really helped to have some perspective on a healthy work environment. The quality of my work improved and I enjoyed work more.

When I decided to move to another state I began the process of giving notice. Since I was happier about work and the people I worked with, I was leaving the job on a very positive note. Then the unexpected happened. I found out about a job opportunity where I was moving that was directly connected to my current employer. I wasn’t sure how to make the necessary connections at first, but I started talking to the people I knew at my work and sure enough people were happy to help. After several phone calls and emails, I was talking to the owner of the company that I wanted to work for.

And I am going to have an interview with him soon! He seems to have your philosophy about work: He also values liking your job over money and he believes in a positive, respectful work environment so employees feel valued. During our initial phone interview he asked me: “Which was more important to me: the job or the money”. As I said in a recent post to you, it was easy to answer: the job.

I never expected that a retail job would lead to meeting the owner of a company. Literally, it was all due to treating people well and having a good attitude. I’m convinced. I was pleasantly surprised by the lengths people will go when they like you and like the way that you work.

The whole experience taught me not to take a “little” job for granted, or to take the people you work with for granted. Everything counts.

Thank you for everything!
Pixel Peony

I don’t really know what to say except that I’m really, really happy that people find the blog useful and that this story shows some of the power in a positive mindset. Good luck with the move and the interview new job Pixel P.

What about you? Have you experienced how a more positive approach turned out to be a good thing?

Here’s a fairly depressing post I found on College Confidential – a forum about college matters:

My parents talked to me today. They were very vague. They didn’t help. They only confused me more.

They said successful people do not do what they like.

Like all the foreign nurses who do not really like nursing, but they are successful and enjoy their success.

Note their definition of successful is money for themselves and families.

Is this true? I told my dad that millionaires do what they like and he said its a lie.

I’m angry, sad, and confused, as usual.

They are not going to approve of my studying abroad or joining advertising club. *sigh*

How do you choose what to study? Do you go for what interests you or for something that guarantees you a job? Or do you just let someone else choose for you?

It turns out that the best way to choose is to pick a study that lights your fire.

A recent study asked 1000 college graduates in Denmark how they had chosen their studies and arrived at two very interesting findings.

1: Study what you like and you’ll get a job you’ll like
It turns out that the people who chose studies they were interested in were much more likely to be happy with the jobs they then got. This is not surprising at all – study something that interests you and you’re more likely to end up working with something you like.

2: Study what you like and you’ll make more money!
But interestingly, people who chose their studies based on interest were also more likely to be happy with their salaries than the people who had chosen their studies based on how much money they could make.

And when you think of it, this is not surprising at all. If you study something that makes you happy you will:

• Be more productive – because people who like what they do get more done
• Be more motivated and energetic – because happy people have more energy
• Learn faster – because happy people do just that
• Study better with others – because happy people communicate and team-work more efficiently

You will probably even have a better time socially while you study because happy people are more fun to be around than miserable bastards :o)

All of this means you will get better grades and have a better chance of actually getting your degree. Which again elevates your chances of landing a job in your particular field AND of being successful in that job.

Makes sense, no?

I’ve also gotta say that to me, choosing your studies based on potential later earnings seems… hollow. Do you honestly want to spend your work life just chasing money instead of doing what makes you happy?

Choosing based on money is also very far from a sure bet. Lots of people have chosen a field that’s hot and in demand in the business world when they begin their studies – only to find that things have changed once they graduate 4 or 5 years later. The world often changes too quickly for such a strategy to work.

Btw: The initial post on College Confidential is a little sad in the way the poster’s parents emphasize the old “work is hard, it’s supposed to be, nobody ever got anywhere by being happy” attitude. But check out the replies:

“Balance what you like to do with what you need to get from it, but you don’t need to find a career that inspires a passion within you in order to do it well.”

“I always say follow your passion, rather than the money”

“You have only one life to live. Why should you devote it to work that you don’t like?”

“A wise man once said do what you love and you will never have to work a day in your life.”

“There are plenty of people who found what they love, who make a living out of it, and who therefore love what they do.”

I could not agree more and it just proves that more and more people are choosing happiness at work!

And if you choose the studies that will make you happy, not only will you be happier at work, you will also make more money.

Related:

• Do you really need a college degree to be happy at work?
• How to find a job you’ll love
• Happiness is the most!

About a month ago, I blogged about an article examining praise in a major Danish newspaper in which I’m quoted as being all in favor of praise. Katrine Dahl who is currently writing her phd thesis on collaborative writing processes sent me an email saying:

And I am quoted in that same article for saying something to the effect that general and superficial praise can be pointless or at its worst negative.

Praise should be specific and concrete (as should criticism!). Don’t say: I love your website. Do say: I love the way you create a friendly community on your website by actually reading and commenting so sincerely on the comments made by your readers. You pay attention to detail. You listen to their stories and connect them with your ideas. You try to give useful advice. You are not afraid of being open about your flaws. I specifically noticed the way you replied to N’s comment, that was…

Giving specific praise is extremely difficult. Paying attention, analyzing, reflecting is necessary. We need to get engaged, to get into stuff, to care.

Unlike sending off non-commital superlatives in all directions, which is pretty easy, but not particularly useful in any other terms than making the receiver feeling momentarily good about herself (which is a very good thing, I am totally with you on that).

The point is, that in order to learn from praise, so that we can do more of what it was that we did well, we need to know specifically what it was.

This dimension of praise is often overlooked. It shouldn’t be. The psychological dimension and the learning dimension of praise can so easily go hand in hand. In fact, I am convinced that the psychological benefits of praise are greater if that praise is given in a specific way.

I could not agree more – praise needs to be specific to be valuable. Thank you Katrine for adding to the topic in such a positive, interesting and useful way :o)