• This is how I make myself happy at work

    QuestionsTwo weeks ago I had a day that I was NOT looking forward to. I had two speaking gigs on a Saturday (which is great!) but they were in opposite ends of Denmark. I had to get up disgustingly early to make the drive to the first one and then there was barely enough time to finish that and drive 350 km to the next one. After that, it was another 300 km drive home.

    It’s starting to get cold here, so there was no way I could ride my motorcycle that day. That meant renting a car, and I was not looking forward to driving that far in some anonymous Ford or Toyota.

    Which made me think of a question I often get: “So Alex – you make other people happy at work. What do you do if you have a bad day?”

    And of course I have bad days too – everyone does. Happiness at work does not mean being utterly ecstatic every moment of every day. As Emma Thompson says in my favorite movie: “There was always going to be a totally shit moment.”

    But in this particular case, I found the perfect solution. One that transformed the long drive from a chore to a pleasure. To something I almost couldn’t wait to do.

    Here’s my trick:
    (more…)


  • Wanna meet up? In Orlando!

    DisneyI’m going to the US next week to meet with and study some American companies and their approach to customer service. You may know some of them… where was that list… Oh, yeah: There’s Coca-Cola, Delta, Capital Grill and some place called Disney or something like that… Ever heard of them?

    I have some free time in Orlando so if you want to meet and talk happiness at work – or if you know someone in the area that I should meet – just contact me. I have some free time on Wednesday Nov. 14 and Thursday Nov. 15. in the evenings.

    Also, if your company is in Orlando and you need a dose of happiness at work, this is a great chance to book me to speak without having to pay my travel costs, since they’re covered already! You can read all about my speaking gigs here.


  • Get a daily reminder to be happy at work

    Happy at work remindersWhat does it take to make us happy at work? What’s one simple, easy, fun thing that we can all do – that works!

    Well I’ve found one that seems way too simple to work, but does anyway: A daily reminder.

    I’ve recently been working with a division of a Danish insurance company that were seriously in need of some happiness at work. They were stressed out, they were woefully understaffed, they had way too much work AND half the people there were new hires.

    During my work with them, I found that giving them one small idea, action, thought or exercise every day to remind them about happiness at work was surprisingly effective.

    This works because it helps you focus on happiness at work. If you don’t, it’s easy to have every intention of making yourself and others happy at work – and then forget all about it because we’re all so busy at work.

    That’s why I’ve set up a new tool that you can use to make yourself and others happy at work. I’ll be using a website called Twitter to send out tips, ideas, quotes, thoughts and challenges as well as the occasional update about what I’m currently up to.

    If you want to get these updates, you must sign up at Twitter.com and then sign up to follow my account. You decide whether to receive the messages as email, via IM or as text messages on your mobile.

    I’ll be sending messages out daily (more or less) and it’ll always be something simple, easy and above all fun. You can of course stop receiving them any time, if you don’t like’em.

    So sign up now, and see how it works for you!

    Thanks to Tom Nixon for the idea and for convincing me to try it.


  • Top 10 signs you’re unhappy at work

    Unhappy at work

    How do you know that you’re unhappy at work? That something is not right and that it’s time to either make some changes at work or move on to a new job?

    In my work, I talk to a lot of people who are not happy with their jobs. Here are the top ten symptoms of unhappiness at work that I’ve observed. How many apply to you?

    1: You procrastinate
    You really, honestly try to get some work done. But somehow you never really get around to it. Or you only do it at the last possible moment and then only do a half-baked effort.

    Many people view procrastination as a personal weakness. To me, it’s one of the strongest warning signs of unhappiness at work.

    2: You spend Sunday night worrying about Monday morning
    “I never sleep on Sunday night very well because I’m worried about going to work on Monday morning. My job is very stressful and you kind of have to gear up for Monday and getting back into that.” (source)

    One of the worst things about being unhappy at work is that the unhappiness bleeds over into your free time. If you’ve had a lousy day at work, it’s difficult to go home and have a great evening. If your week sucked, it’s hard to have a fun, relaxed, carefree weekend.

    3: You’re really competitive about salary and titles
    You don’t like the job itself, so you focus much more on salary and perks. Knowing that someone in a similar position is paid more than you, or is promoted when you’re not, really eats at you.

    When we’re unhappy at work we get a lot more competitive, for one simple reason: When work doesn’t give us happiness and enjoyment we want to get something else out of it. And what else is there but compensation and promotions.

    4: You don’t feel like helping co-workers
    Your colleagues may be struggling. But you don’t really feel like lending a hand. Why should you?

    One very interesting psychological study started by putting subjects in either a good mood or a bad mood. They were then asked to go down the hall to another room where the experiment would continue. In the hallway the real experiment took place – the subjects passed a man holding a big box struggling to open a door. Would the subject help that person? The experiment showed, that when we’re in a bad mood, we’re much less likely to help others.

    5: Work days feel looooong
    The first thing you do in the morning, is calculate the number of hours until you can go home.

    Ironically, this makes the work day feel even longer.

    6: You have no friends at work
    Friends at work? They’re mostly all jerks anyway.

    Gallup have found in their studies of workplace engagement, that one of the strongest factors that predict happiness at work is having at least one close friend at work.

    7: You don’t care. About anything.
    Things can go well or they can go badly for your workplace. Either way, you don’t really give a damn.

    When you’re unhappy, you care mostly about yourself and not so much about the workplace.

    8: Small things bug you
    Small annoyances bug you out of all proportion. Like someone taking up too much space in the parking lot, someone taking the last coffee without brewing a new pot or someone talking too loudly in the next cubicle.

    When you’re unhappy you have much thinner skin and a shorter fuse. It takes a lot less to annoy you.

    9: You’re suspicious of other people’s motives
    No matter what people do, your fist thought is “what are they up to?” Good or bad, big or small, all decisions and actions made by your co-workers and managers are seen in this light.

    Studies show that we’re also more suspicious of others when we’re unhappy.

    10: Physical symptoms
    You suffer from insomnia, headaches, low energy, muscle tension and/or other physical symptoms.

    Studies show that when you’re unhappy at work you’re more prone to experience these physical stress symptoms.

    Your take

    How many of these apply to you in your current job? Did I leave any important symptoms of workplace unhappiness out? Please write a comment. I’d really like to know your take!

    Related posts:


  • The top 5 reasons why most team building events are a waste of time

    Team building

    Here’s how some companies do team building:

    Employees [of Californian home security company] Alarm One Inc. were paddled with rival companies’ yard signs as part of a contest that pitted sales teams against each other, according to court documents.

    The winners poked fun at the losers, throwing pies at them, feeding them baby food, making them wear diapers and swatting their buttocks.

    The good news: The company got paddled in court when an employee sued them and had to cough up 1.7 million USD.

    The bad news: A lot of team building events borrow elements from this approach, setting up artificial (and often meaningless) contests pitting coworkers against each other.

    This is especially ironic because companies today want their employees to cooperate more, to work well in teams, to share knowledge and to work to achieve success together. That is why it makes absolutely no sense to send them on trainings that are mainly competitive in nature. Even when these events let people work together in smaller teams, competing against other teams, the focus still ends up being on competition, not cooperation.

    There’s a simple reason why these events are almost always competitive: Competition = instant passion. Setting up a competition activates a primal urge in many people to win at all costs, making them very focused and active – which looks great to the organizers.

    But there’s a huge downside to this – which means that not only are many team building events a huge waste of time, they can be actively harmful to teams.

    Here are the top 5 problems with competitive team building events.

    1: Competition does not create an experience of success
    Yes, someone will win – most people won’t. If the entire focus is on competing and winning, most participants will leave with a sense that “we weren’t good enough.” That’s not really a good feeling to have created in your employees.

    2: Competition brings out the worst in people

    CEO Hal Rosenbluth was just about to hire an executive with all the right skills, the right personality and the perfect CV. His interviews went swimmingly and he’d said all the right things, but something about him still made Rosenbluth nervous, though he couldn’t put his finger on just what it was.

    Rosenbluth’s solution was genius: He invited the applicant to a company softball game, and here the man showed his true colors. He was competitive to the point of being manic. He abused and yelled at both the opponents and his own team. He cursed the referees and kicked up dirt like a major league player.

    And he did not get the job.

    (From Hal Rosenbluth’s excellent book The Customer Comes Second).

    Competing brings out the inner jerk in some people, making them manic and abusive. Some even try cheating in order to win. This is not exactly a great basis for future cooperation – it might be better if people left the event liking each other more than before because they’d seen each other at their best and most likable.

    3: People learn less when they’re competing
    Studies show that we learn less when we compete and more when we cooperate. Here’s an example from education:

    In a comprehensive review of 245 classroom studies that found a significant achievement difference between cooperative and competitive environments, David Johnson and Roger Johnson of the University of Minnesota reported that 87 percent of the time the advantage went to the cooperative approach.

    In visiting classrooms where cooperative learning is used, I like to ask students to describe the experience in their own words. One ten-year-old boy thought a moment and replied, “It’s like you have four brains.” By contrast, a competitor’s single brain often shuts off when given no reason to learn except to triumph over his or her classmates.

    – Alfie Kohn (Source)

    4: Competition lowers performance
    And contrary to what most people think, most of us perform worse when we’re competing. This is especially true for complex tasks that require us to work with and learn from other people.

    5: Waste of time
    These events focus more on finding and rewarding winners than on making sure that people learn something that might actually be useful at work.

    This creates a sense that the events are a waste of time, and employees come to resent them because they keep them from doing real, actual, useful work.

    How to do team building that actually builds teams

    Here’s what the result of a good team building event should be:

    • A deeper understanding between co-workers
    • Co-workers like each other better than before
    • An experience of having performed well together
    • A feeling that “we’re good at what we do”
    • An increased desire to cooperate and help each other out
    • Specific learnings that can be applied at work
    • And maybe most of all: A sense that the event was “time well spent.”

    This would actually be easy to achieve. We’d just have to change the event so that:

    1. The event has common goals for all participants, making people cooperate, not compete
    2. The event rewards those who get good results but also those who help others get good results and those who help make it a nice experience for everyone
    3. You take plenty of time to let participants reflect on how the learnings from the event can be applied in their work

    You may not get the same hectic moody you get from those intensely competitive events – but that’s actually a good thing.

    What you would get instead is an event that is more fun for more people – and much more useful. That has to be a good thing!

    Your take

    What’s the best team building event you’ve ever tried? Or the worst? How did it help or hinder your team? What would your ideal team building event look like?

    Please write a comment, I’d like to know what you think.

    Related posts


  • The pleasure principle

    NewspapersHey – guess who’s quoted in this article on fun at work in the New York Post? (Hint: It’s me!)

    Take note, though, before you run out to buy a pingpong table, or bean-bag chairs for the conference room (as Motley Fool did): If you’re begrudgingly throwing your employees a bone, it’s not going to work, notes “Happy Hour is 9 to 5″ author Kjerulf. There must be a genuine desire to create a fun workplace.

    “If you just do it because it’s good business it’s likely to feel forced and unnatural to people,” he says. “Fun has to be real, or it’s no fun.”

    The article itself is great – and explains how companies like Motley Fool, search engine makers Hakia.com and many others introduce some fun and games to the workplace.

    My favorite example from the article:

    Desiree Gruber, president of Full Picture, a public relations and event planning firm, brings her two dogs to work daily. Mookie and Sam roam around to greet visitors and play ball with staff.

    “We can never take ourselves too seriously when we have the dogs around,” says Gruber. “Without fail they make the office a more lively, warm, and spontaneous place.”


  • Monday Tip: How’s everybody doing?

    The Chief Happiness Officer's monday tipsHow happy are your coworkers today? How can you tell? You mission this Monday is to find out!

    This is what you must do:

    1. Make a list of all your coworkers who are at work today. Put your boss on the list too, just for kicks (if she’s in today).
    2. Observe them quietly for a while as you go about your work. Just talk to them as you normally would and be your regular self.
    3. Ask yourself how happy each person looks today.
    4. Write down how happy each person looks. Not on a scale from 1-10 (that’s much too complicated), just notice if the person seems Unhappy, Neutral or Happy.
    5. Also write down what you’ve observed that led you to this conclusion.

    Here’s what the list could look like:

    John – Happy – Has a big smile on his face and is very energetic today
    Mia – Neutral – Seems very quiet today, but not really unhappy
    Joe – Unhappy – Looks really stressed out
    Tina – Happy – Was really chatty and happy during lunch

    You don’t have to look for what makes people happy or unhappy and you don’t have to do anything about it. This exercise is about figuring out whether you can tell who is happy it unhappy at work and how you can tell.

    This is a great exercise because it trains your ability to focus on your surroundings. Many of us go through our work days exclusively focused on the work we do, often not noticing people right next to us who may be either very happy (and thus great company) or very unhappy (and thus in need of our help).

    Noticing each other in this way is a great way to build better relationships at work and this invariably leads to more happiness at work.

    A final question: What if you did this exercise with your family?

    The Chief Happiness Officer’s Monday tips are simple, easy, fun things you can do to make yourself and others happy at work and get the work-week off to a great start. Something everyone can do in five minutes, tops. When you try it, write a comment here to tell me how it went.

    Previous Monday tips.


  • Happy birthday to…

    GiftThis blog is now five years old! I can’t believe it!! If you can’t either, I can prove it: here’s my very first post.

    It’s been quite a ride. For the first three and a half years it was pretty quiet around here with wildly irregular posting and just a few faithful readers. And then, last year, it took off like crazy. The day before my own birthday, incidentally.

    Some stats:

    • This is post number 1,203
    • There are 5,325 comments on the site
    • Akismet, the spam blogging software I use, has blocked 167,674 spam comments. Sheeesh!
    • In the last year, this blog has been read by 1.5 million(!) people.

    I feel truly grateful and proud to work on something this… big. And it makes me really happy because it tells me that people all over the world have a deep, lasting interest in happiness at work.

    Some of my proudest moments with the blog have been:

    • Writing posts that get read by tens of thousands of people
    • Getting feedback, ideas, tips and criticism from so many nice people
    • Getting email from a lady in Hong Kong who quit her crappy job because of something she read here
    • Being invited to speak in India, because of the blog
    • Asking for help and getting it

    Now: if you’d like to give this blog a birthday present, I ask for the gift of feedback! I’d love to ask you:

    1. What do you like about this blog?
    2. What could I do to make the blog more useful to you and even more popular?
    3. What has been the most inspiring or useful thing you’ve learned here, that has helped you become happier at work?

    If you’d like to answer one or more of these questions, please write a comment.

    And most of all: Thank you for reading this blog!


  • Do you jiibe? You should!

    JiibeWhat’s the corporate culture like in your current workplace? What’s the ideal corporate culture for you? How much of an overlap is there between the current and your ideal? In what other companies could you find more of a match and be happier at work?

    That’s what a great new website, jiibe.com can help you find out.

    I’ve been fooling around with it and I love it! It’s really simple – the website asks you a series of questions, and you tell it how things are at your current company and how you’d ideally like them to be.

    At the end you get a description of your ideal corporate culture and a list of the companies that match it best – based not on how those companies define themselves but on how other jiibe users rated their workplaces.

    I really liked the questions in the survey, which ask about day-to-day situations in a company. This means that they poll what values a company actually has – as opposed to the values they say they have. Also the user interface is seriously slick and of course the whole concept is brilliant.

    I believe that jiibe can help job seekers find more happiness at work by letting us find companies where we are more likely to fit in.

    And the development possibilities are endless. How about asking users how happy they are at work in order to investigate the effect on corporate culture on job satisfaction. You could let companies state their desired corporate culture and determine the gap between desired and actual culture.

    I could go on, but I won’t. Instead, check out jiibe.com, take their survey – and then come back here and let me know what your ideal corporate culture is like in a comment.

    For instance, my ideal culture is:

    consensus encouraging empowering improvising innovating fun flat cooperative transparent

    What’s yours?


  • Quote

    Following - not leading

    Here’s a great quote, that goes to the very heart of leadership:

    I start with the premise that the function of leadership is to produce more leaders, not more followers.

    – Ralph Nader

    I could not agree more: good leaders create devoted followers, but great leaders create more leaders. Lao Tzu spoke to the same thing 2500 years ago when he said:

    A leader is best when the people are hardly aware of his existence,
    not so good when people stand in fear,
    worse, when people are contemptuous.

    Fail to honour people, and they will fail to honour you.

    But a good leader who speaks little,
    when his task is accomplished, his work done,
    the people say “We did it ourselves.”

    Have you known a leader, whose leadership style naturally created more leaders around him or her? What did that leader do?

    Related post:



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